In relationships, understanding how pride can create distance is essential for building a stronger connection. Just like men and women often think differently, a man’s pride can sometimes block him from fully committing emotionally. Here's what women need to know. 

Six traits that likely mean a man's pride is going to affect his ability to love you

1. He builds a wall of independence

Many men take pride in being self-sufficient. They might say, “I don’t need anyone to be happy,” which can make it hard to form a deep bond. While being independent is important, if he constantly insists he’s fine alone, it may be time to encourage him to open up. Remind him how being together can enhance both partners’ lives.

2. He avoids deep conversations

When it comes to feelings, some men might change the subject or make jokes. They could say, “Why talk about emotions? Let’s just have fun!” While humor is great, this avoidance can signal he’s not ready to connect on a deeper level, as suggested by a study in Communication Research Journal. If he keeps things light, try creating a safe space for him to share his thoughts and feelings.

3. He brushes off relationship issues

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If you bring up a concern and he quickly dismisses it, insisting everything is okay, this can be a sign of pride. Many men worry that discussing problems means they’re weak. If he often downplays issues, it might be because he wants to maintain control instead of being vulnerable. Encourage open conversations about how both of you can improve the relationship.

4. He competes instead of collaborating

In healthy relationships, teamwork is key. If your partner often feels the need to “win” arguments or compete over little things, it can create tension. If he prioritizes being right over being connected, gently remind him that love isn’t a competition. A comparison of studies published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology helps demonstrate it’s about working together.

5. He fears being dependent

For some men, pride is linked to a fear of being dependent on someone else. They may think needing someone is a weakness, causing them to hesitate in making commitments. If he avoids discussions about the future or defining your relationship, it might be a way to protect himself. Encourage him to share his hopes and dreams, showing him that relying on each other can strengthen your bond.

6. He seeks too much approval from others

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Many men look for validation through their work or social status, as explored by an article in the Evolution and Human Behavior Journal. If he focuses more on achievements than on your emotional connection, it might mean that pride is influencing him. Help him see that real happiness comes from within and a loving relationship provides genuine validation.

Here's how to build a stronger connection

Recognizing these signs is the first step toward creating a healthier relationship. Talk openly about pride and vulnerability to help break down barriers. Encourage your partner to share his feelings, reassuring him that committing emotionally is a sign of strength, not weakness.

In love, both partners need to be willing to face the challenges that pride can bring. By fostering trust and understanding, you can turn pride into a bridge, allowing your love to grow deeper and more meaningful. Remember, vulnerability is the key to a strong connection; it’s where true intimacy begins.

Richard Drobnik, LCSW, DCSW, is the Director at Mars & Venus Counseling Center in Teaneck, NJ.