You are attracted to someone, but how do you know when they are interested in you? Reciprocated chemistry is the answer. Reciprocated chemistry is what you feel when you sit beside them or even gaze at them across the room.
Sometimes, the pheromones are so powerful they pull you toward the source like a magnetic force. There is magic in the air and an unmistakable euphoric feeling permeates. How often does it happen? Not as often as you would think.
Here are 7 signs you have ridiculously good chemistry with a guy, according to psychology:
1. You have an overwhelming urge to be close and touch them
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It is like an electric current pulling you to them. It is not always at the right moment, it can be with someone who is out of bounds, but the feeling is undeniable and hard to ignore.
2. You feel butterflies in your stomach
These "butterflies" describe a nervousness you are not used to feeling around other people.
3. You feel like you have ants in your pants
You might feel you are squirming in your seat when you see them.
4. You feel compelled to kiss them
You could experience an amazing urge to kiss them right there at the moment.
5. You want to skip steps
You decide you are willing to sleep with them as quickly as possible despite previous boundaries when meeting new love interests.
6. You can sense their scent even after they've left
From the first whiff, their scent is overly alluring, draws you closer, and hangs in the air long after they are gone.
7. You get lost in their eyes
You are drawn into their eyes and have trouble focusing on what they are saying.
If you are both single this great, but if not, it can be the catalyst for many relationship problems. Due to the magnitude of the attraction, as evidenced in research on the biochemistry of attraction, some people tend to step over their boundaries to act first and deal with the repercussions later.
There are different levels of chemistry. It can be slow and drawn out and become more powerful over time, but more often it is an instant feeling that upsets your existence.
Chemistry with another person is something you feel uncontrollably and is one step further into passion, and it is more powerful than lust. Research on endocrine factors in pair bonding shows when you feel someone‘s energy matches yours, powerful endorphins are released.
Is chemistry doomed to fizzle and die as fast as the flame was lit? As a person matures, so does their awareness. They may become more selective or intuitive due to some of the mistakes they have made in the past and now when they feel it, they know it.
In your younger years, you are hormonally peaking and everything is experimental and not as much about chemistry. Everyone looks and feels good until you start to differentiate with new emotions. In high school, most crushes are experiments with an attraction. No one is thinking about the future yet.
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Ask your partner what the word “chemistry” means to them. Keep it alive and work continuously. Many couples let passion fade by allowing other daily forces to replace it. Nurturing each other first should be a priority.
When you first became a couple, everything else in your life took second place. Keeping the chemistry alive will keep your relationship passionate. Many parents today think it is selfish to get a babysitter and have a date night.
Many older parents fall into this trap because they have waited so long to have a family, they make it all about the children. This is a big mistake. Is it better for the kids to come from a divorced family because the couple who made the kids forgot how to love each other?
Here's what you can do to keep your chemistry electric over the years:
- Put love notes in their briefcase or lunch bag
- Leave an impassioned message on their hotel voicemail when they are traveling
- Leave a note under their pillow or on the counter when you are not with each other
- Give them small gifts that remind you of them
- Send an alluring email or text, even if you live together
- Say something sweet every day
- Listen to what they would like to do and surprise them by making it happen
- Compliment their achievements no matter how small, as supported by the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
Some situations have a few barriers and may need constant nurturing to be kept alive. If they live out of town, you have to be creative daily to keep the chemistry alive. Children from another relationship, owning a business, or huge commitments to their career can play a part in destroying the most compelling chemistry.
Feeling secure is critical and communication is the key to keeping the passion alive in any relationship.
Susan McCord is a dating, relationship, and lifestyle advice coach and show host. She's also a published author, certified coach, blogger, and advice columnist.
