One of the most challenging things for people in any stage of being in love is figuring out what's really most important to you, and what you most deeply and secretly want to experience in your relationships. We all have our preferences when it comes to love, but while you know you want to be "happy" in a relationship, but you may not always know what that looks like for you, let alone what it could possibly mean. And even if you have some semblance of what exactly that "happiness" is, you may not be so forthcoming with your partner by communicating it. But a personality test can help.
This personality test reveals what you secretly want most in relationships.
If you're willing to put in the work, there are therapists who will work with you one-on-one to help establish your goals, and there are plenty of books, apps, and TV shows dedicated to helping you figure out not just who you are, but what would work best for you when you're partnered up.
All of that can sometimes get a little overwhelming, so if you'd rather not wade through self-help book after self-help book — or, at least, not right now — there's another solution. And it will open the door for you to look inward when it comes to your love life.
Look at the image below and make a note of what you see first. Then, scroll down and find out what this personality test reveals about what's secretly most important to you in love and relationships.
Photo: Oleg Shupliak
1. If you saw the man's face first
Oleg Shupliak
If you saw the man's face first when you looked at the picture above, you are a big picture thinker — literally. You can't help but stop yourself from planning everything, from what you're going to eat for every meal the next day down to where the children you haven't even had yet should go to college. It's just how you're wired.
What you secretly want most out of a relationship is stability and control.
You feel best when you're guiding others and steering the ship of your lives. A strong partner who is willing to let you take the helm is exactly what you need, particularly when they trust you enough to kick back and not make any waves.
2. If you saw the sheep first
Oleg Shupliak
If you saw the sheep when you first looked at the picture, you're a sensitive, romantic person who is easily hurt. You have a proverbial mountain of love to give, but you're wary of doing just that out of fear that you will be rejected, or worse still, let down in every possible way. You know being this way isn't easy, but your heart drives you.
What you want out of a relationship is to be constantly swept off your feet.
You want to feel 100% adored at all times by your partner. You want a life of being carried over the threshold daily and surprised with flowers nightly. You want a partner who will show up at your office and serenade you with song. And, what's more, you want someone who totally means it all. You want a life in which romance comes naturally and the love behind it is unquestionably sincere.
3. If you saw the boy at the tree first
Oleg Shupliak
If you saw the boy at the tree when you first looked at the picture above, you're a hopeful realist. You know better than to assume every first date you go on is going to be your last first date, but you can't help thinking about how his last name sounds with your first name. You've been through the mill of dating, but you still believe in love.
What you want out of a relationship is open communication and trust.
You don't need flowers and you don't need grandiose, empty gestures. You need someone who understands that a relationship only works when the people in it put in the time and effort. For you, a partner who can constructively speak their mind is absolutely key. To you, talking about your feelings, both good and bad, is the only way to achieve real and lasting intimacy.
4. If you saw the huts first
Oleg Shupliak
If you saw the huts when you first looked at the picture above, you're the kind of person who is scared of a real relationship. You like the idea of having a partner in theory, but the reality of sharing your life with someone scares you. You've run away from good relationships before, and you may have even ghosted the odd partner here and there. You don't want to be alone forever, but the idea of being in a "real" relationship is daunting.
What you want out of a relationship is friendship and physical intimacy without labels.
Other people can call it whatever they want, but what really matters to you is that your partner is a friend first. They understand that you need to move a little bit more slowly, and they know you thrive when relationships aren't defined.
Rebecca Jane Stokes is a freelance writer, editor, former Senior Editor of Pop Culture at Newsweek, and former Senior Staff Writer for YourTango. She has a passion for lifestyle, geek news, and true crime topics. Her bylines have appeared on Fatherly, Bustle, SheKnows, Jezebel, and many others.
