Do you know the right way to truly connect with a man in such a way that he feels compelled to devote himself to you? If you find that most of your relationships never quite get off the ground, then you may have been taking the wrong road to the path of love.

It’s so easy to get lost on the way to the relationship you desire, so please be gentle with yourself if you can relate to the descriptions below. All of us women have taken the wrong road in our attempts to get close to a man — including myself. If you want him to fall in love with you, avoid making these mistakes.

If you can master these three skills, you'll be the most coveted woman in the room:

1. Don't immediately try to connect with a man through his mind

As a smart, independent woman, you’re probably very good at shining during a discussion and engaging a man on an intellectual level. You’ll impress a man and make him enjoy your company, but you may feel disappointed to learn that he feels no chemistry — even if you have a great deal in common.

That’s because when you try to connect with a man through his mind, he doesn’t feel a thing! For a man to fall in love with you, he needs to feel touched by you in a deep, connected, emotional sense. 

Now don't get us wrong, men love intelligent women. According to a 2014 survey from Match, 87% of men said they would date a woman who was more intellectual than they were.

2. Don't mistake being physical for intimacy

Anastasia Shuraeva / Pexels

Despite what a lot of women think, men do not become attached through being intimate — even if it's fabulous. While every man appreciates a woman who enjoys being with him physically, this is not the reason men fall in love.

Being intimate is only a small part of the whole picture for him. Relying on a physical connection with him will only get you a broken heart — not a committed partner. 

What does it take for a man to fall in love? According to research from The Australian National University, it oddly has to do with his bond with his mother.

3. Don't mistake a deep friendship for a passionate, emotional bond

Eduardo Simões Neto Junior / Pexels

If you’re like many women who are committed to spiritual growth, then you also enjoy being with a man who shares your values. This is a wonderful thing to look for in a partner, and if it’s important to you, then spirituality will be an especially rewarding component of your relationship. Having shared values in a relationship is important because it allows a couple to have the same vision and goals for the future, one study from 2023 confirms.

But it’s so easy to mistake the friendship that can grow between two people who worship in the same way, who care about the same things, and who are devoted to their families or community. It may seem like a passionate, emotional bond when what has developed is just a deep friendship. 

He’ll tell everyone what a great woman you are, but he won’t be dreaming about you night after night. Once you start making subtle shifts like this in your communication with a man — and speaking truly from the heart — I know you’ll be pleasantly surprised at the closeness it creates between the two of you.

Rori Raye is a relationship coach who's helped thousands of women transform their love lives.